34

I turned 34 this weekend so I give you my 34 reasons to just keep on living

1. because seasons change and bring new life and experiences

2. because there's always another tree to climb or adventure to have

3. because there are real treasures out there for those who are looking

4. because you will need to tell your nieces and nephews all about growing up with their parents

5. because there are things God's still working out in your life

6. because your parents will need you one day and they gave you life so respect theirs in their old age

7. because you never know when an old friend will call to catch up

8. because life will not always be pretty, stuff happens but your creator, HE is real good at redeeming things! newness is his specialty 

9. because there are foods I haven't tried and experimenting to be done with new flavors 

10. because there are coffee dates with my girls to be had

11. because there are still lessons to learn

12. because there is joy in serving

13. because my babies and Deacon are growing up and I don't want to miss a minute of it

14. because my house isn't completely organized yet

15. because I still need to buy 3 more place settings of my china pattern

16. because I still haven't won first place at a 5k race

17. because I need to visit my family in NC 

18. because I have a book to write

19. because I want to finish my masters

20. because there is beauty in the world in the most unlikely places

21. because there are victories to be won

22. because there are students who want to learn music 

23. because the college students at church need my cookies to help them learn

24. because my friends need my listening ear

25. because there are songs I don't know & stories I haven't heard

26. because you never know when you may get flowers

27. because I still love kissing my man

28. because my boogie boarding days are not over...there are wave to ride

29. because my snow skiing days aren't over either....and my kids are just beginning to love it.

30. because you never know when a fairy may fly by

31. because God is good and his ways are right

32. because their are still people I love that haven't heard the gospel and accepted God's grace

33. because the sun is still coming up and setting everyday in beauty and

34. my life's story is not over!

Cheers for another year of living!

The Bread and Wine

The Bread and the Wine.

My daily defined= 

"a low"

"a funk" 

"duty" 

"heartless obedience" 

"silent"

Until I got to this song during a workout on Wednesday....

God as we walk this world,
We want to be a sign
Our prayers flow into love,
Giving your life

Pre-Chorus:
Broken but singing
Our hearts keep shining

Chorus:
Let my life shine, come and let my heart shine
We’re going to walk the world and lift the bread and wine
Like the stars shine, come and let our hearts shine
In a dark world, 

we lift the bread and wine

Verse 2:
And we were born for this
Born for this day and time
Our prayers flow into love
Giving our lives

Out of silence he spoke. 

The word was there before me since July 15

Romans 14:20

Do not destroy the work of the Lord for the sake of FOOD!

I rehearsed it, I typed it, I quoted it, I told it

but I didn't live it. 

Powerless. Empty duty.

Can one know the word and it not penetrate the heart? 

Can one stay in silence? 

Just as the sun breaks forth from the horizon, the word came alive in my life.

The bread and wine.

He is the bread and wine. 

What is better than bread and wine? 

Satisfying and Sweet smelling.

Each glass distinct and full of flavor. 

The bread and wine. 

His body, His blood.

The long anticipated sacrifice. 

All of a sudden HE was enough, my bread and wine- 

 the grace and redemption story had me in tears as I tried to continue pull ups and rows.

When nothing seemed to fit, nothing satisfied, no words healed or stirred 

I went back to that song. 

Broken but singing. 

How do I find rest in a world full throttle? 

You exchange, you come to the table tired and worn...

 lift the bread and wine

And walk away renewed.

HE is all I need.

Sweet communion. 

You will wear out, you will experience lows, you will not want to walk the world for Jesus, you will want to quit, you will believe and act on lies- 

Do not quit reading, studying, memorizing, going to church, or talking about HIM with others.

Laundry

When I moved to Velma 8 years ago I was introduced to some of the best neighbors. I have learned MANY things from all of them. One thing that was different about Velma, aside from all the golf carts driving around town, was several people hung their laundry out to dry.

So I tried it.

And during the summer I still do it occasionally. Good for energy conservation I guess. But what it does mentally for me is priceless.

As I take the time to hang each pair of jeans, each shirt...some small, some large...3 sets of clothes getting bigger with each passing year....I say a prayer for that person who wears those jeans.

(side note, the itty bitty boy shirt from days gone by above holds my clothes pins...easy to make and a constant reminder of how much my baby has grown)

A prayer for the preacher.....that God would speak, that he'd be wise and love the Lord with all his heart


A prayer for the boy....that God would speak, that he'd always follow with all his heart,  give him courage and favor, wisdom and grace


A prayer for the girl....that she'd know who she is and how beautiful she is, that she'd use that personality for your glory, that she'd use her hands and eyes to create beautiful things canvas with color, that God would speak, that she'd follow Christ, that she'd find her life in laying it down, that she'd hope and love and God would bless her with a husband that loves like Christ loves

A prayer for the baby....that she'd make connections, she's take in her world, that she'd change us, that we'd discipline her like we did the other two :), that she'd find the joy of following Christ young, that she'd marry a man that loves like Christ, that she'd know the joy of God's word, the beauty of his world and the sweet relationship with him that I have

The jeans keep getting bigger. Reminders of God's blessing and favor, that they are growing and are loved, that God's grace has brought us all together and to this day, that one day they'll do their own laundry (amen!) and that I'll miss going through their clothes one by one.

Spinning Out of Control

Cold winds blow. My home stays warm. I am full. I am beyond blessed. Words can not express my thankfulness so I show my gratitude by living as I should.

Simple? At times, yes. At times no. 

There are times when I fight the call to surrender all, much like Deacon did when Cady wanted to show him the thrill of the slide. Unsure of new things we all question. Trusting God is not natural. 

There are times when it is easier, I have found the years and HIS faithfulness have been proven. He deserves my affection and my trust. I enjoy the ride. 

Then there are times when life calls the shots and I am on the merry go round pushed by a 3 year old and I can't make heads or tales of anything. No one asked if I was ready, no warning, no consult. Loss. Death. Hurt. Pain. Life. Uncertainty.

What I found on the merry go last week is that if I kept my eyes on one thing I wouldn't get sick. I could wait out my "ride".  

Hebrews 12

 ¹ Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, ² fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. ³ Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

Charis, the kitty, and Clara (the cat)

Charis

the kitty next door (who has gone missing today)

 Charis and the kitty

things are much different with the kids in school

we work hard at not trying to work, which is hard work when you can't sit still

we get distracted quite easily

like the book, If you give a mouse a muffin- one thing just leads to another and today somehow we started playing with kitty, till she/he (idk) decides she's had enough and goes home

charis has learned to stay on our side of the street, it's the highlight of the year, remember this?

and before you knew it he was back....the elementary music teaching training in me wanted to burst out in song "but the cat came back, he couldn't stay away...."

Which leads me to Clara....

I have been teaching privately for 16 years now. I never set out to be a private music teacher, I love the classroom and the paycheck and hope to return one day. I have one particular student who doesn't want to take lessons, I am going to introduce her to Clara the Cat this week. Who can resist learning piano with a cat? I am hopeful.

I am so thankful for work, for students and parents, for Clara Schumann and Alfred publishing...

For my man who blessed me with a new camera and a new laptop in the same year!

I am even thankful for distractions and all the precious moments I have with Charis each day.

update: my student loved Clara the Cat!!

LIFE shots with the new camera

I am current trying to find 60 pictures I took this morning of Charis.

I am computer dumb.

One reason may be that none of my equipment is compatible. As I get new I am finding it isn't compatible with the old. But that's life isn't it.

And this post is all about life. As in the game.

I am still reading up on how to operate the new camera but am already finding uses, I mean excuses to use it. Like this colorful old childhood game I introduced my kids to a couple of weeks ago.

Here we go, us in our little cars. I loved this game as a kid.

Hot dog it's pay day!  I used to play this game for the children. I loved filling my car with pretend kiddos. Now I play for the money.

Cady got twin boys. Both Cady and Silas love trying to see who'll have the most children. They can't understand why I'm not upset if I don't have a car load of kids at the end.

They'll even cheat to get more. It's crazy. Cady won with 5 tonight.

The day of reckoning. Ominous.

All games end sometime. (except Monopoly) And the only thing certain in life is that ours will end too. Don't know about you but I know in whom I believe and can't wait to be with him.

My Darlings...and their lunch totes

This is the girl's lunch tote- cute, darling, totally representative of her (if only it talked loudly)


and I have a boy- plain as it gets boy- and this tote also represents him in all his easy going simple being. T-shirt and jeans, hoodie in the winter, same ones every day if I'd let him.

I couldn't keep up with him as a toddler (partly because I was pregnant by the time he could walk). Then he was 2 giving me kisses and then 4 bringing me flowers and the he was 5 walking like his daddy and then he was 7 leaving behind the trains for more complex engineering- legos and then he was 8 talking like his daddy :) And now he's 9 and I don't know if I can say goodbye to his first decade.

Excuse me while I dry my eyes...

Ok, I know God has plans and I know they are good, and I would never want to stand in the way but this is rough and while I could list many reasons why there is only one I want to talk about...

The fact that it's over for me and boys, he has his dad and I am merely a source of food (don't get me wrong we have our hiking and late night talks, I'm not checking out by any means).I feel my future will be the perpetual begging for pink highlights and crying fits over what earrings to wear with which outfits. I have lived my life believing Philippians 4:13 but this seems big and vast and scary -this pink future.

Had I not put 6 years between the ages of my girls this future may not have been so vast, we could've plowed through, learned as we go but as it looks- it looks long, real long, twice as long.

My older daughter got a new fashion doll for Christmas, from a new line called Moxie Girlz- be true be you! I think I needed one- maybe I could throw it out there when I need a little courage to face the unknown world of sleepovers, makeup & fashion, & friendship drama. I was a girl, I know but I have never raised one. And from all accounts I was an easy one to raise...

I set out to write about what a lousy lunch maker I am...I know with all this cooking I'm doing you would've thought I am a pro but no. I am surprised no one from the school has called and asked why I haven't sent a sandwich with my son to school in 5 years? He doesn't eat them, he doesn't eat much of anything and I refuse to waste. (Go green) But these bags represent so much more to me- they represent the little hands , (ok we've moved on to medium hands at this age) that carry them to school and the unique personalities beyond those hands and how extremely daunting the task is to nurture those personalities. So I leave you with this...

Fuel for the future....

I love Joshua 1:9 but I can't leave out v. 8

"Study this book of the Law continually. Meditate on it day and night so you may be sure to obey all that is written in it. Only then will you succeed. I command you- be strong and courageous! (be a moxie girl)Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go. (even into the vast pink future)"

Thanks for reading, I just needed to get that out.

Lessons from the Remodel

Okay so here is the tote in which I carry all the info- measurements, prices, pictures, samples, contractors- it's all in here. I had no idea about remodeling before this undertaking. It has been crazy fun. I will not miss this tote when this is done- it's been a lot of work.

I am blessed to find God in every possible situation I find my self in and low and behold he shows up on my kitchen floor. Well I had to dig deeper, the lesson was way at the bottom layer.

You see the home we live belongs to the church Cody pastors. And they have been so gracious to allow me to remodel. ( I already have an idea to send this to the Baptist Messenger because this has got to be a big deal)

Well for some reason we never really hired a floor person so that kinda fell into our lap so once the cabinets were removed we went to removing the old linoleum ( I thinK I may be finally spelling that right, you shouldn't have some thing on your floor you can't spell). We'll wouldn't you know someone was lazy and decided to just go over an exisiting layer of linoleum instead of taking the time to remove it. So the first layer came off well, then we began the 3 step process of removing the bottom layer because in order to tile (like every should do) we have to have even concrete. So we began. We rented machines, one got the vinyl off but not the paper and glue. the next one didn't do a thing ( a waste of 60$ ) then we were left with a razor blade to scrap inch by inch off (easily 150 sq ft) We clear maybe 6 an hour and Cody can only do it for an hour at a time because it's so hard and only about 3-4 times a day. Anyway it's laborious....

so what does this have to do with God?

Here's the deal in life, there are a lot of times when we just want to make things look pretty and we don't take the time to remove something or deal with an issue. So we just cover it all up. We don't want to deal with our sin, our pride, or our past and we just go on pretending it's not there. But down below the surface of cheap linoleum is stuff that just needs healing, needs be given to God, needs to be talked out with a trusted friend. Just because you can't see it doesn't mean it's not there and someday it'll need to be dealt with.

So here's my experience - deal with it when it comes up. Deal with your past, your issue or your sin. Confess it, Discuss it, Give it to God and leave it for the garbage man to pick up. Start with a clean slate because when we let our feelings or dreams or sin get covered up it's a pain to deal with later. I wish someone would've taken the time to rip up a little linoleum 20 years ago- I wouldn't have had to chisel away at it now.

Don't be lazy in your spiritual walk with Christ, keep a clean foundation with friends and family.

You know another take on the whole idea is- sometimes in our lives there are things that need to be changed and we may deal with it some but we get lazy and say" forget it, who does it really hurt?"

Read Isaiah 39 where king Hezekiah is reprimanded because he did something he shouldn't have done- because of his sin his grandchildren where going to be taken captive and he just put on the new layer of linoleum saying well at least I won't have to deal with it.

Sometimes we believe lies, we make up our own doctrines or make God in our images instead of taking seek truth. The way is narrow, few find it, but I have and it has made all the difference. Me and Robert Frost. :)

Don't take the easy way out. God will honor what you do for his glory and for his name. So that we may shine like stars in the universe- a reflection of him.